I never update this, I never have time. On & on w/ the school readings. I don't have time to read because I have required reading--math for liberal arts, biology, Wisdom Seekers VolI, Sophie's World & a book by Bernard Cooper. I realize to get the job I want I'm going to need to work hard, something of which I haven't done since 11th grade.

Chaos. Spinning. Swirling. I long for May.

Yet, [still] everyday is beautiful, some days are just difficult.

A week ago I was praying & contemplating getting up early to photograph a sunrise. I mumbled "God, if You plan on having a wonderful sunrise wake me up, if not I'll get up at 8:30 when my alarm goes off" As soon as I rolled over I could hear my God saying, "They are all beautiful, you just have to look hard enough." & that is so true.

He is a beautiful artist. His creation is wondrous.

Then, turning to his disciples, Jesus said:
That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food to eat or enough clothes to wear. For life is more than food, and your body more than clothing. Look at the ravens. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for God feeds them. And you are far more valuable to him than any birds! Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? And if worry can’t accomplish a little thing like that, what’s the use of worrying over bigger things?
Look at the lilies and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?
And don’t be concerned about what to eat and what to drink. Don’t worry about such things.These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers all over the world, but your Father already knows your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and he will give you everything you need.
So don’t be afraid, little flock. For it gives your Father great happiness to give you the Kingdom Sell your possessions and give to those in need. This will store up treasure for you in heaven! And the purses of heaven never get old or develop holes. Your treasure will be safe; no thief can steal it and no moth can destroy it. Wherever your treasure is, there the desires of your heart will also be.

I can picture Jesus sitting on the plain teaching, proclaiming the revolutionary news of the Kingdom--the inbreaking of the shalom of God. I love how his way to live life is the antithesis of our way. We plan and prepare and worry and store. But Jesus says something completely different here. He points to a bird and and picks up a few blades of grass --they don't worry about life, they don't toil, they are just dependent. I think we forget money was just as important 2000 years ago as it is today, so why do we reationalize these statements? We have the Kingdom, our Father is pleased to give it to us, therefore we can give our money to those in need; share share share.

I am convinced that if we were meant to keep money it would bear our inscription, our picture, & wouldn't be so easy to exchange.

Is our love really love when it doesn't love the unlovely?
What value is our love when it doesn't extend past our friends & family?